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It's often worthwhile for Montessori educators to try the wiser solution instead of forcing them to apologize for anything!
Don't make excuses!
Has your son / daughter ever seen another kid, lamented that someone had seen him, then made an apology and did not run away? It is understood that this did not help much for the impostor child, nor did your seedling learn anything. But then what could you do in a similar situation? How do you teach your child empathy to notice when they have done something wrong and try to do it? adults have only a neutral role to play. They ask questions to lead the children to clarify their feelings and finally solve the problem on their own.
2. Ask questions like "What happened? What's wrong?"Ask each of you kids what happened. Then ask them how they are guarding themselves. Repeat the story of each child aloud to make sure they understand the cause of the conflict. "You are sad because Peti said he didn't want to play with you, so you pushed him." Then turn to the other kid, "Marci, you're embarrassed that Peti went after you everywhere and jerked your finger."
3. What could you have done?
4. What do you need to make yourself feel better?Many times, children get so much rest. Sometimes, however, one may imagine that one will always be upset or upset. At this point, can you ask what we need to feel better? The little ones often have a cuddle, maybe a glass of water or ice if they are injured. If they help each other out, they will both make you feel better. This is ъn. "Jin message" (when a child says "I feel like ..." or "I want to ...") helped to focus on their own feelings instead of blaspheming.
5. What about the crime?It must have turned out that this method did not mention any crime at all. That's because the Montessori method focuses on natural consequences rather than punishment. However, if one of the children is malignant on a regular basis, additional externalities may be needed. For example, "Marci, this is the second time you have criminally beaten a player. You have to stay with me until you behave properly again."
6. And with forgiveness?Although Montessori teachers are not obligated to apologize to children, if your son / girl is willing to apologize, this is definitely a gesture that you will learn. But rather than forcing the little one to do so, give me an example, and apologize if you make a mistake, or similarly, when the child sees it. You do so much more than to command apologies after every conflict situation. It is also a good solution to ask your child if you want to apologize for doing something that would cause them to. Help her say what she and the hurt party are feeling. There are children who prefer to apologize for a "letter" - this is also an option. Of course, this is not to say that apologizing is superfluous. But there is so much to learn from conflicts between children that it is worth not forgetting them. Give them a chance to tell us what's wrong with them and to really talk about their problems. The world is in dire need of peaceful, good conflict-management people.Related Articles:
- We dare to apologize to the child!
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- 6 key elements of apology